Crime Writer Margot Kinberg

Parties are a big part of the holiday season. But this year, I’d decided to try to get some writing done (it’s been THAT sort of year). Besides, I’m an introvert and not much good at parties. So, when my graphic designer friend, Trey Markes, invited me to his open house, I told him I couldn’t make it.
‘But you have to be there,’ he insisted. ‘I’ve invited some of my friends in the publishing world. Don’t you want your work to get noticed?’
‘Well, yes, I do, I guess.’
‘There you are, then. You don’t have to stay long. Just shake some hands and introduce yourself. And the food’ll be great.’
Well, when he put it that way, I reluctantly said I’d stop by. ‘You won’t regret it!’ he promised me. ‘This’ll be a great way to get you some attention.’

When I arrived at the party, I saw a line of cars parked near Trey’s house, and music coming from inside. I took a deep breath and knocked on the door. It opened immediately and there was Trey, wearing a Santa hat and holding a glass of red wine.
‘Hey, you made it! Come on in!’ He stepped back and I went inside.
‘The living room’s just down the hall and to the right. Bathroom’s at the end of the hall on the left. Drinks and food are in the dining room, right past the living room.’ I thanked him and headed towards the dining room first. I had a feeling I might be glad of some wine.

I hadn’t even gotten all the way to the dining room when a woman stopped me. ‘Excuse me,’ she said. ‘Have we met?’
‘I don’t think so. I’m Margot Kinberg.’
‘I’m Medea Hipe. Pleased to meet you.’ She put her head slightly to one side. ‘Are you an author?’
‘Yes, I am.’
‘Well, then, I know you’d be interested in our publicity package for authors.’
‘Honestly, I’d –’
‘I know, I know, budget’s always a thing. But listen to what we offer. Our package includes a trip to the London Book Fair, an ad in the New York Times, Times of London, and Toronto Star, and we get your book into Oprah’s Book Club!’
‘And how much does all that cost?’
‘Only a thousand dollars!’
‘So, for that price, I get to go to London?’
‘Well, we add your name to our list of clients, and the list is available at the book fair. You’re welcome to go to London, but our clients make their own arrangements.’
‘OK, what about the advertisements?’
‘We call the news agencies and leave your name with the receptionist.’
I could see where this was going, and I hadn’t even gotten anything to eat or drink.
‘So,’ I finally said. ‘What about Oprah?’
‘Well, we do send an email on your behalf.’
‘But there’s no guarantee anyone will read it, right?’
‘You know, her staff makes decisions about the books that make it onto her show. We don’t control what the staff does.’

I thought about it for a second. There was nothing Medea’s company could do that I couldn’t do myself without spending any money at all. So, I thanked her and excused myself. She thrust one of her cards at me as I walked towards the dining room. ‘Reach out to me!’ she called as I left.

The buffet table was loaded with delicious food, so I got myself a plate, and then got a glass of Syrah at the bar. I thought it would be best to sit while I ate, so I took my food and wine to the living room to find a seat. I’d just sat down when the man sitting beside me looked over.
‘Nice party, isn’t it?’
‘There’s sure lots of good food and drink,’ I said. For a few minutes, we ate quietly.
Then, he commented, ‘I don’t think I know you.’
I smiled a little and said, ‘Trey invited me. My name’s Margot Kinberg.’
‘Hi, Margot. I’m Andy Cheatsem.’ We shook hands, and then Andy asked me how I knew Trey.
‘Well,’ I told him, ‘He does graphic design and I’m a writer, so our paths have crossed.’
‘Oh, you’re a writer! You know’ – he lowered his voice – ‘I work for a publishing company. Cloud Nine Publishing. Have you heard of us?’
‘No, I haven’t.’
‘We work with writers through each stage of the publishing journey. We do editing, graphics, formatting, and, of course, publishing.’

I was a bit interested now. ‘Do you have an online submission process?’ I wanted to know.
‘Yes we do. It’s easy, too. Simply attach your manuscript to our short form and submit. We take it from there.’
That sounded too good to be true. ‘So, there’s no review process?’
‘We trust authors. There’s no need for a vetting process, really.’
Then a thought came to me. ‘Do you charge for these services?’
Andy went silent for a moment. ‘Well, of course we have to recoup our costs, so yes, our authors subsidize the process.’
‘And what’s the price?’
‘You really should think of this as an investment, not a price. For a small investment of $2500, we take your book from manuscript to publishing.’ Andy saw the look on my face and added, ‘It’s your author dream come true, you know.’
I slowly nodded. ‘Does that price include promotion?’
‘Well, that price is our standard package. We do offer a top-of-the-line Gold Medal package that does include promotion. It’s a bargain at $4,000.’

That was all I needed to hear. I stood up, thanked Andy for his time, and picked up my now-empty wine glass. It was definitely time for a refill. Remind me not to accept any more of Trey Markes’ invitations.